Does My Inner Child Want To Heal Me?
From the very depths of my heart, I’ve kept hidden, a truth I’ve muffled for the longest time. Inside me, there’s an inner child whose silent cries and whispers have gone unanswered. When I heard folks talk badly about women who didn’t have a decent father figure. Secretly, every word stung like a bee, and underneath it all, my inner girl felt so alone, betrayed by the world and even by me — because I knew, deep down, she was longing for her father’s comforting embrace.
That little girl got lost in the dark one terrible day in childhood. I was just a kid when I was molestered in the basement, a moment so horrific it’s as if my inner child started to cry out so loudly but was swallowed by the darkness. During counseling sessions, I’d find my thoughts wandering back to that time. I could hear my younger self dialogue, feel the raw emotions, the pain, and the confusion.
I tried, to comfort myself ; but apart of me wanted to push that little girl away, to tell her to leave me be because her pain was stealing my peace. I felt tormented, as if I’d lost my pure self. I longed for my father to be the hero I never got the chance to have. Because of what happened, I was thrown into a world of deep thoughts, and I couldn’t enjoy just being my loving, playful self anymore. Times were tough, with my mask firmly in place; nobody could see the girl I once was. Who was I now? What did I truly…
